Hey y’all, it’s your Aunt Linda here. After months and months of begging, I finally have my own feature on this website! Oh, how exciting! Since I have been given the freedom to write whatever my thrice-broken heart desires, I decided to dig deep and do a little bit of investigative journalism. Oh honey, the … Continue reading Diggin’ Deep w/ Aunt Linda: Funyuns
Hey Knotheads, Sour Patch Kids, and the Legion of Cörey, it is I—Corey Taylor—here to bring you my thoughts on some stuff I just read about. Some might find this approach to be a bit shallow. They may ask, “Hey Corey, why are you taking to the presses to share your thoughts on a subject … Continue reading Live & Uncensored: Apples and Bananas
The Potato Penny and Leonard give this whole relationship thing another go, but there’s a catch: this time their relationship is open! The Potato Penny immediately starts seeing another woman on the side (Stranger Things's Shannon Purser), which both arouses Leonard, and causes him deep hurting. Meanwhile, Sheldmond, Raj, and Howard struggle to figure out what … Continue reading Big Bang Theory, “The Relationship Opening”
The day Young Sheldon has long dreaded has finally come: the swimming unit in P.E. class. Despite his fear of water, Young Sheldon discovers that he’s actually pretty good at it. That is until he jumps off the high dive and emerges from the water sans swimming trunks. Embarrassed, Young Sheldon tries to hide in … Continue reading Young Sheldon, “Your Bazinga is Showing”
Hey there Knotheads, Sour Patch Kids, Taylorites, and other fans of mine, it’s me, your favorite heavy metal vocalist Corey Taylor here again to share with you my thoughts on the news and whatnot. It’s been a rough news week, and I know you’ve all been waiting on me to comment on it. And you … Continue reading Live & Uncensored: Hamburgled
The local police are flabbergasted as multiple cases of people waking up with their spleens missing go unsolved without an clues. When Chale becomes victim number ten, Kevin takes the case! As the police pursue a local black market organ harvesting ring, Kevin decides to investigate a mysterious footprint that leads him to an ancient … Continue reading Kevin Can Wait, “Kevin Cannibal Wait”
The crew aboard the International Space Station are in for a shock when the Dan Akroyd of Bars™ takes a trip to outer space to make their little "science" venture profitable. Jon Taffer floats his way over to the commanding officer to berate him about not running the space station like a business. First up … Continue reading Bar Rescue, “Rescue Mission to the ISS”
Hello comrades, it’s your old PAL Jesse “The Newsman” Ventura here again to SMASH your faces into the TURNBUCKLE of TRUTH. AS you may have noticed, I haven’t been AROUND much lately. No, GEORGE SOROS didn’t have me disappeared to a secret DEEP STATE detention center on an EXXON oil rig in international waters. He … Continue reading Breaking News: Teslas in… SPACE
It’s the Super Bowl again, and yet again it’s the New England Patriots versus Some Other Team. The Philadelphia Eagles are set to play the role of Some Other Team, but if they somehow get lost, the Cleveland Browns have agreed to step in on account of their having absolutely nothing better to do. The … Continue reading Super Bowl 2000: Attack of the Football
What’s up, my Knotheads, Sour Patch Kids, Taylor Dandies, and other obvious fans of mine, it is I, your lord and saviour Corey Taylor. That’s right, I used a “U” in savior. You see, I’ve been to the England many a times. In fact, I might just go there again next week. You see, I … Continue reading Live & Uncensored: State of the Union RESPONSE
Yo Knotheads, Sour Patch Kids, Taylor Disciples, and other cool cats, it is I—your lord and savior Corey Taylor. You know what I read today? Well, quite a bit. You see, despite being the world’s most famous and most handsome rock and roll singer, I still make time to get a lot of reading done. … Continue reading Live & Uncensored: Tax the Sun
It is true that I went into the movie Downsizing wearing a shirt that declared, “I hate the movie Downsizing.” It is also true that I sold these shirts to the friends with whom I saw this movie. At the time of having these shirts printed up, my hatred of the film extended only to … Continue reading Bing Bang Review—Downsizing
Knotheads, Sour Patch Kids, Cult of Corey, and anyone else who might be reading, it is I—the Great Corey Taylor—here to dispense my thoughts and wisdom on you. You see, as a celebrity rockstar rock god, it is my moral obligation to dedicate at least part of my very busy schedule to inform the uneducated … Continue reading Live & Uncensored: What a Shithole!
A scheduled visit from Meemaw is cancelled when she comes down with flu. Young Sheldon takes it upon himself to care for his granny while she recovers. When he tries to whip her up a batch of fresh French onion soup, he horribly burns his hand. He tries to hide his injury from Meemaw, but … Continue reading Young Sheldon, “Green Around the Bazingas”
When the Big Bang Gang™ attends the midnight release of the new Star Wars® movie, the group is split on how to feel about it. Leonard and Howard both say it was the worst movie ever made, whereas Raj and Amy counter their opinion by saying that it was the best movie ever made. Sheldmond—the … Continue reading Big Bang Theory, “The Herd Separation”
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