Coming Up Next…

Welcome to this new feature. In today’s crazy-a-go-go world, it can be easy to miss out on good TV during the weekend. Fret not! Coming Up Next… is here to highlight some good stuff that will be airing throughout the weekend. Enjoy!


September 8-10

Friday

Real Time with Bill Maher, HBO

Bill Maher makes tired jokes and questions germ theory before moving onto a shouting match masquerading as a panel discussion. Tonight’s panelists are the Ghost of Adolf Hitler, Billy Joe Armstrong (Green Day), and some junior senator from a red state whose beliefs are utterly repulsive, but seem like a voice of reason when compared to a vapid musician and the ghost of a literal genocider. Seth Rogan is also there to let everybody know that both he and Bill Maher smoke marijuana.


To Catch a Predator Drone, MSNBC

The hidden cameras are back as Chris Hansen hires police officers posing as pre-teen terrorists to lure Predator Drones to the Dateline McMansion. Watch as the robot death machines squirm as they are confronted by a man who once dreamt of being a journalist.


The Fast and the Furious: Live!, Fox

The testosterone-driven, car-crime action extravaganza you love drifts off the silver screen and onto the stage, LIVE, for the first time in front of a pre-recorded studio audience. Featuring a star-studded cast and 16 brand new songs written by the legendary band Hoobastank, this is one musical adaptation you don’t want to miss! Starring Mario Lopez as Dominic Toretto, Rebecca Black as Mia Toretto, and the hologram of Paul Walker reprising his role as Brian O’Conner.


Saturday

College Football, ESPN

The Washington State Cougars take on the Boise State Broncos in a game some experts call foot•ball. The Cougars are fresh off a shutout victory last week. If they want to keep the winning streak going, they will need to do whatever it takes (within the confines of the rules) to score more points than their opponents.


Guy Fieri’s Sausage Fest, Food Network

Steve “Smash Mouth” Harwell’s Black Lodge doppelgänger is back again, this time infiltrating college fraternities and teaching them some wicked sweet culinary concoctions, while also learning a thing or two himself. Tonight, Guy heads to Stanford to show them how to cook frozen taquitos four ways. Later, he heads to Duke for a ranch chugging contest and to find out the meaning of love.


Best of Saturday Night Live, NBC

Instead of showing a classic episode from a season people actually care about, audiences will be treated to a Best Of compilation featuring nothing but the overshared clips of the show that you have already seen on Facebook dozens of times. No less than 5 Alec Baldwin as Donald Trump skits are played in their entirety. Hey, remember when Trump hosted this show?


Sunday

Celebrity Family Feud, ABC

Misogynist comedian Steve Harvey evaluates his career decisions as he hosts yet another night of the celebrity edition of the Feud. Tonight we have talking owl Larry King vs frequently unemployed sports/news anchor Keith Olbermann; “comedian” Tom Arnold vs (alleged) murderer Steven Avery.


Bar Rescue, Spike

Failed genetics experiment Jon Taffer has his work cut out for him at The Unlucky Leprechaun. Jon must convince a worthless piece of slime to stop drinking on the job, clean up his bar, and to serve 20 drinks per minute or else the business will shut down. PERMANENTLY!


The Real Harry and the Hendersons, TLC

In this riveting reality series, we follow the daily lives of the Mendoza family and their struggles to assimilate a sasquatch into their upper middle class suburban lives. When Larry the Wood Ape tries to tip a barista, Rochelle—the family matriarch—sees this as an opportunity to teach the mythical beast how to treat people in the service industry with nothing but scorn and resentment.

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